Inspector’s Log – Suitably Scented Candles

For this inspection, I would be the panel guy, while Prissy would walk around testing. I handed her the Smoke Cannon and Heat Ray, and instructed her to be on the lookout for a red “DSD” sticker on the ceiling grid to find the single duct detector. It was listed on the report, but its location was not adequately described by any of the previous crews.

Sorry... I didn't want to interrupt you, but I only caught like half of what you said.

Ack!

Guess I had to start the spiel over again from the beginning. She had a hearing aid, and was almost completely deaf without it. She appeared to have turned it off, which defeated the purpose of testing the horns.

I turned it DOWN, buster brown. Check it - analog, baby. Potentiometers and everything.

Okay, I believe you.
You know, some early electronic horns use trimmer pots for pitch. Maybe you should add one, and make everyone sound like they're on helium.

Maybe I will. Not like this old thing's under warranty.

I liked this girl’s spunk. I apologized for accusing her, and offered to let her carry around the decibel meter next time (the one I almost never used). Amanda unlocked the stockroom again for the final smoke and pull. The air was moving faster below the bare ceiling, and Prissy complained of having to tilt the blaster into the wind.

Typically, when this happens, it means that real smoke will have similar trouble reaching the detector. I went in to see for myself, and saw exactly what the problem was. The air supply diffuser (i.e. the air vent) was too close to the smoke detector. I was able to get the puffs of smoke to hit it after a couple tries, but a recommendation was still added to the report to move the detector out of proximity.

Prissy came back and opened the janitor’s closet, and started shooting a ridiculous amount of smoke at the detector. I considered letting her figure it out for herself, but that would be too cruel – and we’d be wasting valuable ammo.

Yep, that one fails.

Look at the map again.

Wait - that's a heat?! But there's no gray ring on it! Oy, vey...

Fire-Brite and Lucifire didn’t start adding gray rings to their heat detectors until the generation after this one was manufactured. Instead, they manufactured them in a slightly different body style. The confusion was understandable.

After zapping it with the Heat Ray for about a minute, the detector tripped. Now, was time for the most challenging part of this tiny inspection, which was searching for the duct detector above the ceiling. We forgot our stepladder on the truck, but fortunately, the customer kept a six-footer around. Unable to find any stickers or markings, Prissy began looking for tiles that seemed unusually worn or cracked. Ashton taught her well.

Already wearing her safety cap, gloves, and goggles, Prissy put her gaiter around her face as an extra precaution to avoid inhaling ceiling dust. And to think the old crew used to make fun of me for showing up even somewhat prepared…

She found it on the first try. We mused amongst ourselves as to why the description was so vague, when it was so easy to find. There was a hint of sarcasm in our voices since we already knew the answer.

*COUGH* LAZY TECHNICIANS *COUGH*

I spotted her on the way up. She unscrewed the cover and sprayed the detector head directly with the smoke aerosol can. The LED went steady.

Tag! You're it.

…

ALARM: DUCT DETECTOR
AHU RETURN
08:45A – 06/28/203X – D12

I handed Prissy a red DSD sticker and had her place it on the ceiling grid, with the arrow pointing towards the most convenient way to access the detector. Prissy reattached the cover and put the ceiling tile back into place. I helped her carry the ladder back to the stockroom, and we went over the deficiencies with Amanda, who we could tell knew her system fairly well.

I mean, it's the year 203X. Who doesn't know what addressable means?

We had her sign the report, and then did the same on our end. After it was finalized, we provided her with a copy and forwarded it to Ashton, who would be calling back with a service quote. We placed her panel back to normal, while mall security took care of placing the main system back online. The inspection was now complete!

(Prissy and I treated ourselves to lunch at Tempura Tree on the lower level, before heading to our next call.)

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